Today I discovered a free book on Kindle. The book is titled, “Who Was Who: 5000BC-1914 (Biographical Dictionary of the Famous and Those Who Wished To Be)”. It is causing me to question many things, but also it’s making me laugh. So I thought I would share a list of my favorite entries.
- Aristotle – Introduced brains into Greece. Love it.
- Marcus Aurelius – One of the few Romans who is not remembered for crossing a river, for being murdered, for murdering somebody, for making speeches, or building triumphant arches or ruins.
- Berlitz – The man who will teach you how to say it in everything.
- Cain – One of our ancestors of whom we do not brag.
- Chaucer – An early experimenter in English language. Notorious as a bad speller.
- Winston Churchill – Wrote books for a living.
- Winston Churchill – Did not write books for a living.
- Madame Curie – One of the few women who got her name in print without being a suffragette or an actress.
- Daniel – Ancient lion tamer. Also performed the difficult feat of remaining in a fiery furnace without his family applying for the insurance.
- Death – A hideous man who called at least once in a lifetime.
- Eifel – A Frenchman who built the second tower of Babel, but who was wise enough to stop before he got too high.
- George Elliot – A lady who wore a mans name and wrote books.
- Galileo – Inventor. Star gazer. Proved himself an imbecile by declaring the world revolved when everybody knew it was stationary…
- Hamlet – A Dane who had difficulty with an auxiliary verb. Also founded the foolish questions.
- Martini – manufacturer of an American before-dinner drink which tastes too good.
- Othello – killed his wife when she lost one of her favorite handkerchiefs.
- Plutarch – The only man who had more lives than a cat.
- Father Time – A very old man who has been introduced to everybody. Very unpopular with the ladies. A great wound and sorrow healer.
I have to say, this book is very…yeah. But regardless, these are the ones I liked the most!